I've been MIA, and for that I beg your forgiveness. But I have an excuse... sort of. Just hear me out, ok? So this past weekend was my Grandfather T's 80th birthday celebration blowout. On Friday, my immediate family and I (MomLady, Pops, Sissybug, and myself) planned to leave for Williamsburg, VA from our home in Nashville, TN at approximately 7:30am. I even slept over the previous night so I wouldn't have to drive over early that morning. I must go on a side-rant at this point to point out the fact that my mother, God love her, is never on time for anything. Not anything that she doesn't deem important anyways. I love my Mom. She's an excellent person, and I've never met a single being who didn't like her. But seriously, the woman can't show up on time to save her life! That being said, she is the sole reason that we didn't pile into our car on Friday until around 10:30am. Three hours behind schedule. Now, Sissybug and Pops didn't really

Exercise #156: How did they end up bankrupt?? They tried to keep up with the Jones's.  Sketch out the bones of this sad little story. (Hint: you might just make a list of some of the things they did, and the consequences.) 1,2,3, GOOOO! It was infuriating. Edgar Jones had the same job as me. He was paid the same amount bi-weekly. His wife was a stay-at-home Mom, and my wife had a job that paid nearly as much as mine did. And yet there they were, living luxuriously across the street from my family and me. A new 52" plasma tv? Sure! A shiny grill for the back porch? Definitely! Every day, their wealth smacked me in the face, saying, "Hey, Paul. Just face it: we're better than you."

Exercise # 155 : "Bumper Stickers" The messages people plaster on their cars! KNITTING IS SEXY.  MY CHILD IS AN HONORS STUDENT.  TRUST IN GOD SHE WILL PROVIDE.  MY OTHER CAR IS A CADILLAC.  And of course, political messages span the spectrum. What's on your bumper? Your neighbor's? Colleagues's? Relatives? Friends? Have you seen any you thought amusing? Finally, for your fictional characters, make a list of the bumper stickers they might have on their cars. 1,2,3, GO!!!

My father and I have never really had a great relationship, and, honestly, it frequently feels almost like we do nothing but tolerate one another. Don't get me wrong; I absolutely love my father. He is always there for me when I need him, and he never fails to offer an objective, logical answer for any of my problems. He's also a genius. Seriously. I came home one day while I was in high school and plopped my backpack on the floor.

... to fridayflash, of course!   It's been a long time since I've taken part in the lovely business called fridayflash (twitter hash-tag terminology for those of you who don't tweet), and I decided around, oh, an hour ago that I was going to make an entry this week. Actually, that's kind of a lie. I was laying in bed (at 4am, mind you), and this story idea kept rolling around in my head, practically screaming WRITE ME, DAMN IT! So I finally said, "Fine! I'll write you, ok? But only if you let me sleep after I finish." When I got no reply, I chose to take that as a 'yes,' so I forced my eyes open, turned on my bedside lamp, and scribbled for approximately 20-30 minutes. This flash fiction is the result:

Exercise #154 : "Saturday To Dos" List three things you typically do on a Saturday. Then list three things you used to do on a Saturday but don't anymore. Three things you would like to do but never have. Three things you did but hated having to do. Three things you could do but won't. Three things that you especially enjoy doing. Three things you could do that it has never, until this moment, occurred to you to do. 1,2,3, GO !!!

Exercise #153 : "Smells Today" What smells have you smelled today? Make a list. LITTLE-KNOWN FACT : I have an incredible sense of smell. Like, bloodhound-worthy. Ok, maybe not that strong, but I can usually pick out faint smells of which no one else is even aware. I consider it both a blessing and a curse, because there have been 1 or 2 times where I've smelled gas when the stove was on and no one else knew, but there are also times that I simply cannot eat particular foods because they smell so strongly to me. For example, broccoli. I. Hate . BROCCOLI. Consult the image to the right to see what I see when confronted with broccoli on a plate...

I am officially taking suggestions regarding the look and feel of my blog.

I promise this is the last one... for a little while, at least. I just felt the need to get these out, being as movies don't stay in the theater for a long time. Chances are most of you have seen this one already, but meh... I'm going to post it anyway, damn it! Before I even comment on the content of the movie, I'm going to take a step out there and say that the casting was all wrong for this movie. While I admire nearly all of the actors involved in this film, I cannot say that I enjoyed this movie as fully as I could have.

I'm gonna give this one a big old "Meh..." Having played the game back when the Sands of Time trilogy came out for PC, I was expecting a lot from this movie, and I left the theater feeling terribly disappointed. First things first, why on Earth do Persians have British accents??? I mean, I get it. We have to make the movie accessible to the masses, but really? British? Apparently, all Americans need to suspend reality enough to make us think we're in a different part of the world is a British accent. Perhaps Jake Gyllenhaal can't do another accent? I don't have the answer for that, but it annoyed me throughout the movie. Who cares if I'm a stickler? As far as performances go, Ben Kingsley was wonderful, but I have yet to see him in a role in which he did not excel. He's always fun to watch. Gyllenhaal was alright, but I had a completely different idea of the type of person Dastan was. Sure, he looked moderately appropriate, but there was just some

From a mildly annoying leading female to a somewhat dull leading male, Killers was tolerable at best. I didn't hate it, but it also didn't strike me as a movie that, at the end of the day, mattered. It was a cute movie that served the purpose of diverting my attention for 2 hours, but it did not accomplish anything past that. Those words may seem harsh, but when Hollywood seems to be pumping out nothing more than drivel, I keep hoping to sit in a theater that is showing a truly excellent film. Unfortunately both for me and those involved with the movie, Killers was not it.

Exercise #152 : "Out in Front" On a typical morning in June, if you were to stand out in front of your residence, your back to its entrance, what would you see? What would be there that is always there? What would be moving? What might surprise you? Be as specific as possible, using colors, shapes, smells, sounds, etc. 1,2,3, GO! This exercise moves us into month 6 of my list, and that means that I'm nearly halfway done. Woo!! It's summer, and that means the canna lilies are blooming right by my front porch. I always love this time of year, because my "little" cannas reach for the sky, and unfold their beautifully colored petals to the world. Sadly, the blooms are short-lived, but it gives me something to look forward to all year round. Additionally, it's odd to stand next to a flower that's nearly as tall as you. Flowers are supposed to be dainty... right? See? Lovely!

Yes, this was for the French release. So sue me...  This one is a bit late, but I figured I needed time to ruminate over my thoughts. That may be a cop-out, but meh... I'm not chap-assed about it.

I was getting ready to do today's exercise, and I must say that I paused for a second after reading this one. Exercise #151 : "What's On Your Desk?" What is on your desk? Be as specific as possible. Really push, making a list of even things you do not have a word for (check out a visual dictionary if you can). Hmm... Haven't we seen this before ? (the actual exercise is at the bottom of the page in the link) Sadly enough, I don't really use my desk. I use it more for storage. Whoops. I should probably get on that. Right now, it's housing several stacks of books as a result of going through my library in an attempt to thin it out a bit. Must take those books to my local used book store... Because we've already done this exercise, I'm going to give you guys a visual prompt.

Exercise #150 : "Doris & Ted" Doris just got fired because the manager, Ted, told everyone else in the restaurant that she is the world's most incompetent waitress. Ted now tries to convince Doris that it's really for the best. Write the scene in dialogue. Hint: The most effective dialogue usually shows character, mood, relationship, and/or conflict. 1,2,3, GO!! Ted: Doris, don't take it personally... Doris: "Don't take it personally?" Are you nuts? How could I not? T: Because... D: Ah, I see. "Because." The world makes sense again. You know, you're really something.