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2017 - Week 10: Taken

No, not this kind of "taken."
Wellp, Flowers done hooked me, it seems.

No, he hasn't kidnapped me, forcing Popsicle to scour the Earth for my captor with the fire of a Colon & Rectal Surgeon scorned (no one wants to see that, trust me). And yes, this is another relationship post. Deal with it. It's what's going on in my life right now, ok?

As someone who was "irrevocably single" as of 3 months ago, I, for one, am flummoxed as to how this has happened. Well, I guess I'm not completely flummoxed. You were all there when he was wooing me HARDCORE both on our first date and even before the date. I guess it's no surprise that he would end up convincing me to be one of those "in a relationship" girls who are all Facebook official and shit.

Honestly, I was in denial until a few days ago.

No, I'm not in a relationship. We're just getting to know each other as adults. We need to take this hella slow because both of our past relationships were batshit crazy. Nope. Not in a relationship at all. WE'RE NOT, OK???!!

Except we text every day, throughout the day.
We tell each other goodnight every night.
We wake up and immediately text a happy "good morning" to one another.
Our weekends are blocked off for each other.
We drive 2-2.5 hours just to see each other.
Sigh...
I'm in a relationship.


Now, don't misunderstand my sighing as displeasure. I have been unequivocally single for quite some time, and I had resigned myself to remaining as such for the remainder of my days. Now, to some that might sound like giving up, accepting spinsterdom, and putting in my request for my single lady's allotment of cats, but I wholeheartedly disagree with you.

I'm content on my own. I don't need another human being to determine my happiness, and, if need be, I am fully capable of finding happiness and entertainment in myself until the day I die. Having another person with whom I can share my life is lovely, but it's not a requirement for happiness. And I feel like that's a very important distinction to make.

I had even gone so far as to make a rule for myself: Stefers, you will not go into a relationship unless it is absolutely extraordinary.

Well... it would seem that I have stumbled upon extraordinary.

I don't intend to get all gushy on you all, but this guy... Guys... He's wonderful. He treats me so amazingly well. My opinions matter, he tells me that I'm smart and beautiful regularly, and he supports me toward becoming a better person. He makes me feel like I can take on the world.

Guys.
He's nice to me.

To most, this might seem like a "well, duh" sort of statement, but as someone who fell into the toxic cycle of an abusive relationship, this is HUGE. In fact, it's giving me a whole lot of perspective that I'd never considered before.

I have reached a point where I can finally look back on that steaming shitpile of a "relationship" in my past and be grateful for it. Don't get me wrong. It was awful. It was painful, and I have the scars to show for it. To that end, however, it has given me a massive sense of appreciation for my current relationship.

I know what it's like to be treated very poorly, so when someone treats me well, I notice. And treat me well, he does. 

We're only a months or so into this silliness, but I have a good feeling about it...

Peace.
Stef.

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